After moving to a new flat, all I want to do is to spend time there. I know summer is the time when you should go out all the time and do things that you can’t do during the winter. But is it really like that?
I feel that everybody should spend their holidays doing the things they really want, not what they are expected to do. I think people put so much expectations on holidays that when the holiday actually arrives, it’s more stressful than stress releasing. I’ve never had expectations on my holidays and usually when I travelled I didn’t make plans and that was the key, after every holiday I truly felt rested. I slept long even though I knew that I would probably “miss out” something. Maybe, but in the end if I didn’t do it how can I know that I missed something out because in the end it never happened.
Life is all about gaining and missing opportunities. Previously it would make me anxious and especially missing opportunities would make me so anxious that I wasn’t able to enjoy the moment because I would already be thinking about the next activity. I would be planning my next trip when I was still on the way. I couldn’t just sit down and be. It’s really difficult. I still feel that I have a lot to learn but just even recognising that helps a lot.
Whenever I start to feel restless or anxious I ask myself these questions.
What can I do to make this feeling go away?
Do I really want it to go away? Or am I secretly enjoying it because afterwards you always feel better and you know it?
What if I don’t do anything about it, how it would make me feel in long term?
And then I’m already going towards solution x because no one likes to be anxious.
And the brutal thing is that there’s no other way. Those feelings aren’t going away unless you do something about them, otherwise you just have to live with those feelings. I believe the solutions are there for everyone but sometimes it’s just hard to see them and it’s also scary to face them. This has to do with all types of situations, losing weight, breaking up, finding a new job, starting a new project, facing problems when travelling, chasing dreams and the list goes on forever. If you want to lose weight, it requires a lot of commitment, if you are not willing to do it, you just have to accept yourself as you are and stop complaining about your situation. Same if you are in a bad relationship, either you work for it together or you have to let it go. If you want to achieve something you have to ask yourself are you willing to work for it, if you are not, you have to lower your expectations and let go. Life doesn’t make sense if you just go through it eyes closed surrounded by problems that you created yourself.
I think we should look for solutions all the time. Whenever you face a problem you have to start already picture the solution. If you spend too much time thinking about the problem and analysing it, you can get too deep into it and finding the solution can get harder. I know some problems are bigger than others and some problems can’t be solved and everybody faces problems in a different way: someone’s problem doesn’t seem like a problem to another person at all. But I think it’s important to stop creating trivial problems for ourselves because we all do that sometimes, complain about things that are not worth complaining about.
Whenever I read about how people get stressed on their holidays because they think holiday is the only time they can do things, I think they have already forgotten that having a holiday is that kind of luxury in their lives that they should be thankful for. If your stress comes out due to spending too much time on social media and seeing Instagram-stars having a better time than you, just think about it a moment: why are these pictures appearing to me? Did I choose to look at them? What can I do about it?
I’ve been so relaxed just chilling at home cleaning and doing my little projects that I just wanted to share some thoughts. I know I could be at the beach or exploring my new neighbourhood or doing million other things. That’s also completely fine if someone is doing it. Since my Spring was really busy I decided that I really have to just stop for a moment. Spending my time at home has made me go through all those feelings that I wrote about above and I felt stupid because I really enjoyed doing my little projects at home and in the end everyone is able to spend their time as they want to and it shouldn’t be anyone else’s business. So if you really want to spend time at home even though you feel like the rest of the world is doing something else, do it. It doesn’t make sense to force yourself to do things that you don’t want to do. Trust me, you will have a chance of enjoying a sunny day, I’ve heard that the Sun won’t shut down in a while.
So, enjoy your holidays and don’t focus on unnecessary problems, holidays might not always be perfect, but usually they’re really nice.
Now I’m going to read a book, maybe outside or on the sofa, we’ll see.
Ps. I got a stomach bug while writing this post so I was forced to stay at home as well. 😀
– Eeva –